Will Roberts is the country's preeminent Will Rogers Tribute Artist, and now adds 60+ news websites that he produces an audio podcast and written story on days events, everyday..

W i l l R o b e r t s

BY WILL ROBERTS |

The Circus is in Iowa! The Republican/Democratic Circaucus! ----- Here you are Sir.

Well it's a New Year and so much happening to get us off to a great start. Oil prices 100 dollars a barrel, Pakistan, CIA debacle… but issues tall and small are being trumped by the Rep/Dem Circaucus. If you are planning on making a big splash here in the beginning of 2008, you had better wait.

Don't solve world hunger, cure cancer, or stop global warming. But on the flip side, if you are a Hollywood untouchable this week, it might be the best time to get that DUI or commit a crime, no one will notice, not even your own mother … especially if she lives in Iowa.

They say that the first 30 seconds you meet someone sets the impression you have of them forever. If this is the case, The New Year's baby is looking like a used car salesperson. The wheeling and dealing of the candidates this week and I am afraid until February makes the media circus look like a mere sideshow. Listening to these candidates on the airwaves, let me correct that, you pick up a candidate anywhere, Radio, TV, Internet, and even the town parrot, he will be squawking about this for the next day or so and if the parrot could vote they would fly those birds and provide crackers at the caucus. They are calling folks, emailing, and anything possible to get the final word out. "Say the hundred dollar word" "Change".

I don't know how you all see this, however, I think republicans got it made, they get to show up wave and make there case, then catch a plane to NH and start campaigning there. Democrats being the emotional types decided to turn the debates into negotiations. They will be barking all night to sell their wears. Democrat's are looking like the sexy party this time around. But then again they do have the best-looking figure 32-28-24.

Democrat's are making these Iowa folks feel right at home, feed them, babysitting services, anything that helps them get counted. Now you democrats remember that if you get into office and we have another Katrina you had better do the same as you are doing with these folks in Iowa, making them feel at home. Help is something you should get out of necessity, not as a bribe.

If you have an allergy to the word yes, Yes to change and yes to just about anything you can ask these candidates you better plug your ears and don't be fooled by a yes answer. A little trick someone told me about a long time ago is to speak as though you think yes to everything. "I want you to know that YES you want change and YES you want the war over and yes you want our troops back and yes you want lower taxes and more healthcare, now step away and all those yes's make a BIG NO, they all sound like YES MEN. Or woman.

But if something happens and they get in office and don't make one of the promises, well they will be the first to say. YES, you want this and YES, you wanted that but I want the country to be safe and so I say no. After all they did say yes to everything you wanted, because yes is all you wanted to hear. In the great words of Will Rogers "In on promises, out on alibi. Oh and for all you politicians that don't make it past tomorrow night, Give back the money you raised, it should be considered a vacation fund.

I will keep these comments short; as I know, I am not being heard today, all attention is on Iowa. If you know anyone, that you can email or phone, get to it. Tell them to vote for the candidate that will make a change, or will get the job done, or will figure out the war… Hmmm maybe we would be better with inny minny mine-e moe.

Give a Hoot, Don't Pollute!

Now all I know is what I read on the Internet, and I see THAT (Nobel peace prize recipient) Al Gore was in Switzerland. He was receiving his award for his work with global warming. It is a very honored title to have; some of the folks that have received it in the past are Theodore Roosevelt, Dr. Martin Luther King Jr. and Henry Kissinger. And nominees like Joseph Stalin and Benito Mussolini, Adolf Hitler, I only counted five women out of about 100 winners, kind of a boy's club thing you know. It s like being knighted, Sir, STING, or Sir Bono it is an earned title. But Mr. Gore can finally get rid of that title us Americans gave him a while back, the one that weighs him down you know Vice President. The only title left for him to get that carries prestige, fame, and fortune, and is a sign of our American way of life is: American Idol.

So, today and a handful of other days I suspect he will be gloating in this award recognition, hopefully not too long, we need him to get back to work. Wasting of time is a natural by product of fame. You get folks to recognize your talents, and then you spend most of your career resting on your laurels. Strike while the iron is hot, Mr. Gore.

However, while he is resting and building up his natural energy to get back out there and make corporate America accountable for their waste. I would like to sneak in a small thought. Let’s call it a secret, shall we? But this secret is best passed on. And hopefully when it hits the masses it will have the same message at the end. So, earlier in my writings, I spent some time shedding a little light on something I call Personal Environmental Irresponsibility, or better know as Litter. Only you can’t call it by simple name. That would be to easily misunderstood, plus you have to have a marketable name, all; the one-word names are saved for soft drinks and energy drinks, you know, Jolt, Rockstar, Cocaine simple and easy to grab your mind when you are half-alert. Causes are different; they need to have phrases that make you feel like you are really working for the most important - to save the world. Say,I came up with PEI, see that naming with initials thing does not work either, it makes it sound like something that drug companies can latch on too, PEI Personal Environmental Irresponsibility.

No pill will help this sickness. It is running ramped in our world. It is something that we see everyday and every night, round the clock and ongoing. It is a disease that a GREAT portion of the world is sick from and it is the reason … I believe we are truly facing global warming. The way to an epidemic is started with one small virus that takes over, weather you know it or not, and it can only be stopped when we realize we are sick or have an epidemic on our hands. The same holds true for the hands of global warming. Litter is the virus and a Large-scale blow out of this disease brought us global warming.

Personal Environmental Irresponsibility LITTER has taken a VERY BACK seat to Al's global warming. His message has certainly had nothing but a great effect and has spearheaded a movement in the right direction. But, it leaves out the very simple task of making everyone accountable for there actions--littering. Folks say, how can I help, it's the big boys that have made this planet a muck, they marketed me, my life, my car, my supplies at work, the very products that surround me, what can I do?

Granted we try what we can but while we try in mind our bodies still LITTER. Now stop and ask yourselves, do I litter, paper, cigarette butts, (75% of the litter every year is cigarette butts). I would not want to litter in my new car ashtray that is what the streets are for. That is what someone told me one day when I asked them why they dumped their butts on the ground. People are paid to pick up our trash. People are paid to kill people, does that make it right? I have even had folks tell me "it’s a whole movie thing" when you are smoking and it comes to the end of your cigarette and you toss it with a sense of disregard, Kind of James Dean-ish. Thank you, Hollywood for that programming our world.

As an ensemble, I just think that if you lie and it becomes second nature some day before you know it you will have a Library. The same goes for Personal Environmental Irresponsibility – LITTER, if you litter and just don't care, how can you parade on the streets to save Mother Nature. You can't say no to drugs if you sell them in the first place. We can't point the finger with one hand and litter with the other. That is called a hypocrite and that is an art best left for the politicians. I think it is time to start simple, every person, one person at a time STOP littering, don't police others, I used to think that was the key to make folks aware of what they are doing, but that only makes folks mad and want to do it more.
Live by example, but first set the example. Ok, here is the secret we are passing on: Don't trash our land throw it in a can. I like that, PLEASE pass it on, and if you can’t, just keep saying it to yourself, over and over again. I bet will not only see a major different in the land we live on and the air we breathe but also we will see better attitudes in our people. Then maybe the big boys will feel the pressure to create better ways to create and get rid of their waste.

Did you get what you wanted for Xmas?

Well now, I am totally confused, last week, Christmas Eve. In the middle of finishing up my Christmas shopping, when I say finish it, it really means, starting and finishing of my Christmas shopping. Cause I am guy, nuff said. By the way, there is a segment of the male population that thinks that after Christmas is the best time to shop for folks. That is when the best deals are to be had. On the other hand, there are shoppers that will take advantage of the same after Christmas deals for next years gift giving, who is crazier?

Anyhow, it dawned on me as I was struggling to get the words happy holidays out to the clerk behind the counter. Happy Holidays, Holiday, the word holiday. So I did a Webster search, Holiday or. . HOLY DAY. A Day set aside for the celebration of a RELIGIOUS Festival. All this time folks have been trying to be politically correct they have been religiously correct. Oh well, I will spend the next 300 and 60 something days trying to figure out how to greet folks during this time of the year.
However, I did get most of what I wanted this year: A rope that I hope catches things better than the one I have now and few other things that folks thought I needed, doubles and triples of. I did a little research on gift giving and found out that it is relatively new to the Christmas "Package" it started only 175 years ago. Most of the time it was just meant for the servants and the kids. It was about the spirit of the season, whatever spirit you believe in. Jimmy Stewart has his spirit, and scourge has his and so on and so on. Now the reason for the season among other wonderful things is the giving and getting of presents. So I put together a list of some of the things I see folks got this year.

IRAQ WAR: Looks like the WAR got a nice little present; President Bush slipped a small amount in the stocking of the Iraq war 70B dollars that will fill it nicely, let’s just hope that stocking doesn’t have too many holes in it that has to last them until Christmas 2009. A long with this 70 billon in war spending, Bush was forced to wrangle over 9000 head of PORK to some of the oddest justifications for spending of the taxpayer’s bacon. It a time of war OR possible recession I only have one thing to say, "What's the BEEF!

TRAVELERS got a nice gift from the airlines – delays, Delays, Delays, to the extent that good deals of folks were stranded with very little choices. However, one good thing that may have come from this, It seems that New York is looking to pass a bill that makes Airlines, in New York responsible to care for the flyers if they are stranded, Food, drinks, . . . comfort. Things you think would be a given when you pay as much as you do for flights. Let’s hope this catches in all states.

I took a flight this season to the Island of Maui; a seven-day vacation that only took me 4 days to realize I was not supposed to work. On the way back it was a direct red eye flight, 6-7 hour flight back to Phoenix, AZ. Now as much traveling as I do I have become and expert on airlines. As long as this cowboy has legroom and a little water, I am good to go. However, I had a first with this airline, No pillow or Blanket! On the plane, well unless you buy the travel package for $9.99 (Pillow and blanket made for a Barbie doll). If you want cranky, keep people cold and give um a creek in their necks, now that is torture. I always like give folks the benefit of doubt so I will keep the name of the airline name out of my comments. Just add your own disgruntled airline into this story.

STOCK MARKET: They bounced back from a SMALL gain of sales during this holiday season. Which gives those big boys the best present of all, CONFIDENCE, confidence that us buyers will continue to go into and stay in debt. We trust them to invest our money and they trust us to spend it.

Hopefully everyone got what they wanted this year and as we are coming to the end of 2007 and starting a year that is already printed in the history books – 2008, remember each day we have a choice to help folks who will never get what they want, purely because they don't have the opportunity to get things they want or only struggle for things they need. Lend a helping hand and give to folks who need. Weather it is directly or through your favorite charity. I won't get into the philosophy of giving, I will only say: it is the thought that a count, what they do with the money when it leaves their hands is on their conscience. Not yours.

Speaking of not getting what you want for Christmas, I consider myself luckier than the Democrat's all they have wound up with is a 3-way tie for Christmas.

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Rusty Hardin is about to play hardball with baseball to clear the fastball of Roger Clemens

Now, normally I don't comment on sports, mainly on the account of it is so far back of the paper, and by time I got to the sports page, I'd have enough material to build a farm, a fun farm! But lately sports have been corrupt enough to get it self on the front-page with all the other organized crime, politics, and real estate. Headlines: (baseball) Report: Clemens' probe hires attorney Rusty Hardin. I guess if you are the fastest pitcher in the game you need the heaviest hitter to field the ball, Rusty Hardin is that man. Just to give you a small idea of this lawyer's effectiveness, here is what was quoted about Mr. Hardin.

"He is all things a great defender must be — raconteur – which sound French for racketeer. Showman- watch the movie "Chicago "Givem the old razzle dazzle, charmer- as in snake, and egotist — and he has a ferocious charisma that a rival once described as 'slicker 'n deer guts on a doorknob.'" Come to think of it, this description could be used for any number of candidates running right now. Don't be surprised if you see this man on a political ticket real soon. The only thing that would stop him is he makes too much money running his own show. Politics does not give that much flexibility. In any case, Clemens has brought this pinch hitter in and mark my words; this will make the game of baseball really interesting in the months to come. My only hope is that baseball is left with some dignity so that we have a game to go back to.

Front-page status means you really had to aim high or sink low to get that spot. Baseball has enough fouls to steal the lime light from that OTHER game of dirty pool in progress right now, the republican/democrat race.

But I am not going to talk anymore about this until I get just a little more dirt. You will have to wait until the seventh inning stretch. Instead, let’s go down a few columns to a story that has been in the news and out for the past few months, Michael Vick. , Football player and dog lover. Let me update you all just a little bit so you don't forget what happened. I find that when something happens to animal's people have a short memory. Now if you remember, Mr. Vick, while he was throwing winning touchdown plays was also throwing funds to a dog-fighting ring.

And like any good businessperson, he has been instrumental in helping to keep quality control over these animals. Something along the lines of what Hitler did with the folks he considered useless, he euthanized them. Mind you, it was not done in a humane way either. No sir, I won't go into the details but let’s just say that if football does not work out for him there is always the CIA, head of water boarding. Ok, so threw very quick court proceedings he wound up getting a 23 months prison sentence. 23 months that seems fair. He will probably only serve 6 months. If animals could speak up, they would ask for a harsher sentience. If anything, make his 23 months in dog life 2 = 22 years.

The most recent story in the news reads " " he has rallied the troops and is trying to get leniency for his MERE 23 months, on the grounds that he, growing up did know that dog fighting was bad, it was just a way of life." He has called in some big names to attest to his character. Hank Aaron, some others … and his mother. He has more support than some of our candidates and a far better track record. He goes onto say that; he truly is an animal lover. With love like that who needs enemies. He might love animals just not live animals.

I will tell you what I think, have MR Vick write a public apologue and make him recite it during super bowl half time that is to make sure that he has the most of his peers watching. In his apology, we will give him a word to define. He has to write about what this word means to him. NO help, just straight VICK. Here is the word, Leniency; and just in case you need a little help with this task here area few words to help you. Compassion, humanity, kindness, and mercy . . . then maybe, maybe Leniency should be considered. Now what I speak of here is just my wild idea and May never be seen or heard of again. But if we see him walk or throw a pass and he gets off with a lesser sentence, without making a major amends (Disclaimer: having a good lawyer that gets you off is expressly forbidden in this offer) then we are doing a big disservices to Humans best friend. Oh, character witnesses are fine, but you can't use your mother. Dogs and mothers are unconditional they don't care what you do to them they'll still love you just the same. Fair is fair no matter what your position in life. Hut … Hut … RIGHT?

Will Roberts is the country's preeminent Will Rogers Tribute Artist, and now adds 60+ news websites that he produces an audio podcast and written story on days events, everyday.

"All I ever knew I read in the newspaper" was not only a famous Rogers quote but also the honest truth. Rogers scoured any and all newsprint he could get his hands on...which made for some incredible viewpoints.
Roberts has updated that quote, "All I ever knew I read on the Internet". With millions of news events being sent to the web, Roberts is sure to never run out of things to say.

Not only has he fashioned a fantastic touring show much like that of his predecessor but he has also taken up the reigns of Rogers' weekly radio broadcasts and news articles.

Roberts spent 7 years as a feature reporter an on air host with FOX and CBS and now brings his natural style to his writing and daily audio’s

In this age of instant gratification the internet has made it possible for Will Roberts to reach maximum exposure and capture new and old audiences alike.

Weaving his blend of Political Humor and insightful observations of the human nature he has brought back to life the the wit and wisdom of Will Rogers.

"I never met a man I didn't like", was quoted by Will Rogers...and we are sure had Roberts and Rogers ever met, never a truer statement would have been said.

N E X T_P A G E S _| Please open before Christmas, its for the kids.

Don’t gamble unless it is a winner
Christmas Cheer
Don't hug a tree