Five Tips for Traveling with Others

by Nadine Nardi Davidson, author of

Travel with Others without Wishing They’d Stayed Home

www.TravelwithOthers.com

Traveling with a group whether college roommates, buddies from work, or couples you've known for years, can be the best way to share costs and good times. Or it can be the worst mistake you ever made. The truth is that traveling with others can be hazardous to your relationships, particularly if you are different types of travelers. Here are five tips to help you survive traveling with others.

1. Be clear about how much time you expect to spend together.

Are you going to stay at the same resort and get together once for a round of golf or a dinner out? Or are you going to hang out together all day. Having different expectations can lead to hurt feelings. It’s best to dash off a note or email such as "We are so delighted you're going to be in Hilton Head. How about getting together for dinner on Thursday?" That makes it clear how much time you expect to spend with them so no one feels neglected.

2. Be clear about who pays for what and put it in a note or email.

This is particularly important if you invite others to join you on a trip. They may think "Oh, we're going to be their guests and it won't cost us anything" while you're thinking, of course "we'll split expenses." So there you are on the road grumbling “Boy these people are real mooches” while they’re angry at you because the freebee trip they were expecting is costing them so much. Again, it’s best to put it in writing: "You're half of the condo cost will be $150 a night and you can figure $100 a day for the rest.”

3. Be clear about who will be responsible for cancellation penalties if one of you cancels.

The cancellation by even one person or one couple can effect everyone's costs, particularly if the rate for a vehicle, or guide, or group activity has been divided by the number in the group. Decide in advance, who will be responsible for these increases. You may want to agree that if someone backs out, that certain portions of the trip will not be refunded.

4. Make your restaurant selections in advance of the trip.

This is particularly important if one of you is a vegetarian, one is a meat and potatoes lover and another is allergic to flour. The "Where shall we go for dinner " discussion could begin about 5pm and continue into the evening as each person's restaurant suggestions are shot down by someone else's dietary problem. It's also important to have reservations when a group is over four.

If you are traveling with a group of eight or more it’s also a good idea to designate one of you as the treasurer. The treasurer is the one who pays the restaurant bill and then collects from everyone separately because the last thing you want to do is waste an hour figuring out who had the apple pie and who didn't. On the other hand, if you're the only one in the group who doesn't drink wine, for example, you'll want to work out some adjustment for yourself in advance.

5. Beware of the "Odd Man Out" factor.

If you are traveling with two friends or two couples and they both have a closer relationship than you have with either one of them, you may always be the "odd man out" Their vote to go shopping will always out weigh your vote to see the Tower of Pisa. If that doesn't bother you, it won't be a problem. But if you are going to resent it, then you are probably better off traveling by yourself.

©Copyright 2006 Nadine Nardi Davidson

Nadine Nardi Davidson has spent 25 years as a travel consultant and is currently a leisure and honeymoon specialist at Travel Store Inc, Los Angeles. She is the author of Travel with Others without Wishing They'd Stayed Home, a survival guide to traveling with your spouse, lover, boss, friends, kids, someone else's kids, parents, in-laws and other relatives, your pet and yourself. The book is available through book stores, or by calling toll free 888-837- 2665 or online at Amazon.com or www.TravelwithOthers.com.